Once a Dancer, Always a Dancer
I spent 15 years of my early life as a professional dancer, and although I can no longer kick over my head, I realize now that the mindset of the dancer will always be with me.
First and foremost the dancer knows you need to be in class every day. Daily learning and practice keeps the muscles and mind in shape and keeps you on top of your game. As a result I am committed to lifelong learning, practice and improvement. Although there are days when I just don’t feel like it, I always feel better after having done the work.
The dancer’s world is built around choreography – the structure of movement. Every movement, every expression, has a reason to be there. If I don’t take time to examine the intent of the activity it can end up as random flailing around.
To dance you have to listen to the music and go with the flow. You need to let the rhythm of the music and the movement carry you. I try to find a rhythm to my day and the activity I am involved in. It all comes a lot easier if you listen to the music of life.
When you are dancing you have to be willing to put yourself out front, to perform to the best of your ability every time you dance – while making it look easy (the result of daily practice). I try to remind myself to take risks, get out in front, stretch myself, and go easy.
If you have been a serious student of any activity, even if you no longer actively practice that discipline, the mindset is still with you. The challenge is to make that mindset a part of who you are and the work you do.
Were you a runner, a swimmer, a musician, a writer, a sculptor? Maybe you still are… Think about it.
Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn’t music. ~William Stafford
Dance is the only art of which we ourselves are the stuff of which it is made. ~Ted Shawn
Self Reliance
What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude. ~Emerson,Ralph Waldo
The Problem With Problems
Sometimes, when you have a problem, it’s important to diagnose and fix it. A car problem, for example, or a medical problem. But problems of other kinds can become a trap. You try to think about the problem, find out why it happened (maybe even blame something or someone), and generally sink deeper and deeper into the muck and mire.
Have you ever had a problem and found that the more you thought about it, the worse it got in your head? Did you find yourself thinking about the problem at the worst possible times, to the detriment of other things in your life? Did you find yourself so caught up in the problem that there just didn’t seem to be a way out? I know I have.
One alternative is to switch from a Problem Focus to a Solution Focus, using what I call the GPS System
Ok, let’s say you have a problem.
Imagine, for a moment, that the problem no longer exists.
- How will things be when you no longer have the problem?
- How will you feel?
- What will you do differently than you are right now?
- What will other people notice about you and your actions?
That is the solution, your preferred future, your Goal (the G of the system).
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the place where everything is as it should be, the Goal state, where are you right now? Pick a number. If you don’t know the answer, guess. This is where you are right now, your Position (yup, that’s the P)
Now, what did it take for you to get to the number/position where you are right now?
- What actions did you take?
- How did you think?
- What skills did you use?
- You have a history of success already by having gotten to where you are.
Next, imagine that you have moved up one number on the scale, one step further on your journey to the preferred solution.
- How will you feel?
- How will you act?
- What would be the first thing that others would notice about you?
What small action could you take, now or in the next day, to move you up the scale? Can you commit to taking that action? Think in small, incremental steps (you guessed it, the S)
You are now focused on the solution, rather than the problem. Focus on moving toward your Goal, in small, easily achievable action steps, and the problem should disappear all by itself.
You’ve Got 15 Minutes
There’s a problem. You’ve got 15 minutes to solve it. What do you do?
Someone hands you a stack of documents, or a book, 15 minutes before an important meeting. What do you do?
You have 15 minutes to pull together a dinner for 4 people. What do you do?
You need to teach someone everything they need to know to take your place at your job. You have 15 minutes. What do you do?
Sometimes we get so caught up in the minutiae of the work we do that we lose track of the big picture, the building blocks, the basics. Could you apply the 15 Minute challenge to everything that you do?
I don’t know. But think about it. I will…
Direction vs Discipline
Direction is more productive than discipline. To master discipline is not hard work. It’s actually no work at all, because work requires time and effort. A shift in your direction of focus is instantaneous, with zero expenditure of energy. … When you observe behavior that appears motivated and disciplined, you can always trace it back to the choice to simply put a focus on one thing versus another. ~David Allen
Ask yourself:
What are you focusing on?
Tired?
You cannot get tired without forming a mental picture of yourself being tired. ~Matthew Furey
Ask yourself:
How to you act, feel, look, breathe, move when you are full of energy?
Action:
Form a mental picture of yourself when you are full of energy and raring to go. Feel the energy, the excitement, in your mind. And then smile and pretend that you feel great.
What’s Next?
I worry a lot of people fall into the trap of believing that they need to make big life decisions before they can start doing anything….Your life doesn’t need to go through a predictable story arc. It doesn’t have to start with a dream, follow through hard work and end up in a nice home with four bedrooms. Instead it can twist and travel. You don’t have to know the final answer, you just need to act on the next step. ~Scott H Young
Daily practice. Ask yourself:
Next?
Dare to Dream
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. ~Mark Twain
Ask yourself:
Do you have a dream? What would you like to do, be or have?
Action:
Write your dream down in as much detail as possible and then come up with a short phrase (1-3 words) to describe it. Write that trigger phrase at the top of your daily calendar, so that it is always in front of you, and ask yourself everyday, “Is what I’m doing moving me closer to my dream?”
Keep It Simple
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler. ~Albert Einstein
Ask yourself;
What could you simplify in your life or in your work?
Remember:
In many cases, less is more.
The Real You
Seek out that particular mental attribute which makes you feel most deeply and vitally alive, along with which comes the inner voice that says, ‘This is the real me,’ and when you have found that attitude, follow it. ~William James
Ask yourself:
What do you love to do?
Action Step:
Make a list of three to five things you love to do, and schedule time with yourself to do more of them.
